Thursday, May 29, 2008

Don't Think I Didn't Lysol My Monitor

It's taken me a bit to work up the intestinal fortitude to write this particular incident up, but here goes.

I'm sitting in my office one day, as almost all of these posts start, minding my own business. It's been a particularly hard time for me at work-- lots of projects, demands on my time, general shifting of duties around our department, etc.-- so I've not been paying Overshare all that much attention, and she's been under some stress too so she hasn't been demanding all that much either. I must admit, it was nice. Nice to just come into work every day, do my work, and not have Drama all the live-long day.

I should have known it wouldn't last, but I could never imagine it would start back up like this.

Overshare walks in, puts her elbow on the top of my computer screen and proceeds to roll up her sleeve to well past her elbow.

Overshare: I either have ringworm or Lyme disease. Which does this look like to you?

And honestly, it looked like the foul Satan-child of both of these images:




(And before any of you get upset with me for posting such disgusting pictures, let me tell you: I did you a favor. Google-searching for images of ringworm is foul. FOUL, I tell you. Just sayin'.)

I WISH I was making this crap up, I really do. Have I mentioned that I'm not a doctor? Or a registered nurse? Why is she asking me for a diagnosis? I guess I should just be thankful The Nasty was on her arm, and not in a more... er... delicate region.

Anonymous: Uh... I don't know.
Overshare: Huh. Guess I should call my doctor.

But did she call her doctor? No. Have you forgotten who we're dealing with? Why call a health care professional when you can overshare and THEN call a health care professional?

No, she chose instead to ask EVERY. OTHER. EMPLOYEE. what this mysterious red circle could possibly be on her arm. She talked about which diagnosis was more likely all day, and at one point, printed out pictures of both issues (apparently that Google search didn't bother her at all) and held an impromptu comparison party with a group she accosted in the kitchen. Because nothing says "Mmmm... LUNCH!" like a highly communicable fungus or burrowing insects.

At the end of the day, she came back into my office, rolling her sleeve back down her arm.

Overshare: Jeez. I can't believe people in this office sometimes. You know that everyone spent all day talking about my arm? Don't they have work to do?

17 Comments:

At 1:40 PM, May 29, 2008, Anonymous Anonymous said...

That's not ringworm. That's where the old condom say for way too long.

 
At 1:30 PM, May 30, 2008, Anonymous Anonymous said...

YUCK

So what was it?

Hickey on the arm from some wicked orgy?

 
At 7:28 PM, June 03, 2008, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Now that is just plain old nasty! Missed your posts.

 
At 11:46 AM, June 09, 2008, Anonymous Anonymous said...

gross!

 
At 12:29 PM, June 09, 2008, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I can't look at your blog anymore, it's too gross. Post something else!!!

 
At 7:32 PM, June 10, 2008, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Imagine the dude who tried to convince overshare to wear a condom on her upper arm? I mean seriously people, that is one awesome dude.

 
At 7:42 AM, June 11, 2008, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I don't think it takes much to convince Overshare to do anything. She s a willing particpate.

 
At 2:12 PM, July 30, 2008, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Where are you? We are missing you! :-)

 
At 6:01 PM, November 10, 2008, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anonymous, in this time of economic uncertainty and professional difficulty, we NEED more stories of Overshare.

 
At 2:21 AM, November 19, 2008, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I thought I was an oversharer, now after this post, I am just a sharer with many acquaintances.

 
At 12:35 PM, January 22, 2009, Anonymous Anonymous said...

we need new posts!

 
At 2:08 PM, March 27, 2009, Anonymous Anonymous said...

we miss overshare....

 
At 5:07 AM, April 08, 2009, Blogger Dan said...

Where are you? Have the adventures stopped? Say it ain't so.

 
At 9:22 AM, May 08, 2009, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Please...where are you? I have been periodically checking to see if there are any new entries and there is nothing. I hope all is well with you.

 
At 9:27 PM, June 03, 2009, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh where oh where have you gone? Really miss reading your blog

 
At 9:27 PM, June 03, 2009, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh where oh where have you gone? Really miss reading your blog

 
At 10:12 AM, December 03, 2010, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Please come back to us! I haven't read anything as funny and interesting since your blog!

 

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