Ground Rules

Anonymous: So, what play did you crazy kids see this weekend?
Overshare: We didn’t.
Anonymous: Oh… so you’re seeing one soon?
Overshare: No, we’re not.
Anonymous: Okay…
Overshare: Here’s the thing. I went over to his house on Saturday to pick him up. We had tickets to go see Wicked.
Anonymous: You had tickets but didn’t go?
Overshare: Yep.
Anonymous: Why?
Overshare: I had wanted to grab some dinner first, but when I brought it up he said he didn’t want me to pick him up too early because he had promised his mom he would do some stuff around the house.
Anonymous: Ok.
Overshare: But I thought something was up, so I went over early anyway.
Anonymous: Uhoh.
Overshare: Uhoh is right!! She was there.
Anonymous: Swedish Nanny?
Overshare: YES! Can you even believe that?
Anonymous: Well, kind of, yes.
Overshare, ignoring me: So, Anonymous… I completely lost it.
Anonymous: Lost it how?
Overshare: I snapped. I walked in the front door of his house (read: his parent’s house) and found them on the couch in the living room, making out. I just completely snapped.
Anonymous: Snapped how, exactly?
Overshare: I started throwing stuff.
Anonymous: Throwing stuff?
Overshare: Oh, not at CTF. At Swedish Nanny.
Anonymous: Oh, well then…
Overshare: And that little witch actually ran from me. She ran down to CTF’s room in the basement and locked herself in down there. So I just started yelling and screaming at CTF. His parents came down from upstairs and tried to get me to calm down, but I wasn’t having any of it. I can’t even believe that he was with her instead of having dinner with me before the show.
Anonymous, thinking that this could be the end of CTF: How did things end?
Overshare: Well, when I finally calmed down enough, I laid down some ground rules.
Anonymous: Ground rules? You mean you’re giving him another chance?
Overshare: Well, yeah. Of course! He loves me; it’s just that Swedish Nanny won’t let him go.
Anonymous: Of course.
Overshare: So the rules are: 1. Swedish Nanny is not to be seen. I don’t want to be anywhere near where she is, ever. 2. No more of the two-dates-in-one-day thing. If he sees her, he won’t see me until the next day. 3. If he sleeps with Swedish Nanny, then he’s not to sleep with me for at least two days.
Anonymous: So you just left it at that?
Overshare: Yeah, I went home and he went downstairs to calm down Swedish Nanny.
Anonymous: And the tickets?
Overshare: I gave them to his parents.