Shoes

The next couple of posts are going to be more sad than funny-- just a forewarning. But just so you don't get too bummed out, enjoy what is one of my most favorite Toolshed/Overshare moments:

Toolshed: I really like your shoes.
Overshare: Thanks! I have really large feet for a woman. They'd probably fit you.
Toolshed: Can I try them on?
Overshare: Sure!
Sounds of laces being untied, shoes being slipped off.
Overshare: Here you go.
Sounds of laces being tied....
Toolshed: I like them! Where did you get them?
Overshare: Nordstrom's I think.
Toolshed: Are you sure? Because I'm sort of a shoe whore and I think I would have noticed these there. I always shoe shop there.
Overshare: Better a shoe whore than a true whore.
Overshare: Wanna wear them around today?
Toolshed: What will you wear?
Overshare: I'll just go barefoot at my desk, and put your shoes on whenever I need to go somewhere. No one will notice.
Toolshed: Thanks!

How CTB Became CTF

To recap: CTB told Overshare that he was 25, single, and a former school teacher trying to decide if he should go to law school.

We have since learned that CTB is actually 34 and lives with his parents.

And then, The Day happened. The Day when CTB became CTF.

Overshare, in my office again: Should I take a sick day tomorrow to go to CTB's court appearance?
Anonymous: I'm sorry-- court appearance?
Overshare, knowing she didn't tell me: Oh, didn't I tell you?
Anonymous, pondering why she's such a glutton for punishment: No, you haven't. Why does he have a court appearance?
Overshare: Apparently he beat a man into a coma one night at work.
Anonymous: Beat a man into a coma?
Overshare: He was protecting himself-- the guy pulled a knife.
Anonymous, skeptically: But into a coma?
Overshare: What are you trying to say?
Anonymous: Just that maybe CTB has some anger issues.
Overshare: Well, I think it's sexy.
Anonymous, baffled: I'm sorry. Sexy?
Overshare: Well, yeah... just think about all the power beating a man that hard takes....
Anonymous, disgusted: I don't think it's sexy at ALL. It's downright scary.
Overshare: Well, if you were sleeping with him, you'd understand. He's a powerful guy. He can't control it.
Anonymous: Well, maybe he should try.